Loading chapter…
Loading chapter…
Chapter 20 of 33
~11 min · 2,380 words
Year 0. The Ember-Tree Reaches and the cliff-edge of the Sundering, Lythariel.
The fragment, this evening, glowed.
It had been humming for many sleeps. The humming had been the steady humming Lyra had grown used to. The fragment had not, in those sleeps, been bright. The fragment had been, in her pocket, the temperature of a stone held in a child's hand for too long, which is to say warm and silver and small. The brightness was new.
She had been threading the silver wire through the bow's lower limb, replacing the second length of fraying braid she had set this season. She had finished one. She had been beginning the second. The fragment in her pocket, sewn against her ribs, had begun to do something it had not done before.
It had begun to be visible through the cloth.
She set the bow down on the small cloth she kept for it.
She unbuttoned the pocket. She took the fragment out.
It was the same fragment. The shape was the shape she had pulled from the bark of the ember-tree at the eastern wing of the Reaches, however many sleeps ago. The size was the size. The color was, at most hours, the color of polished silver. This evening the color was the color of polished silver and also something slow, the way a candle was a candle and also something slow, except that there was no flame.
The fragment glowed.
It was the slow glow of a thing that had stopped being able to keep its work invisible. It was the glow of an effort. The fragment had, over the weeks since the threshold, been reaching for something it had not reached. The reaching was, in this evening's hour, beginning to push past the cloth.
Lyra held the fragment in her open palm. She watched it for a long count.
It did not increase. It did not diminish. It glowed at exactly the steady glow of a candle that had not yet been blown out.
She put the fragment back. The cloth at her ribs was, she could feel without looking, glowing.
She rolled the bow in the cloth she kept for it. She slung the satchel over her shoulder. She drew the bow across her back.
She walked.
She walked east, the way she had walked the evening of the threshold, except that the east, this evening, was not where the fragment was reaching. The fragment was not reaching east any more. The fragment was reaching through her. It was reaching at the cliff-edge of the Sundering, which lay, by her old count of the Reaches, perhaps an hour's walk south.
She did not, in the evening, walk her usual pace. She walked at the pace at which the fragment was reaching. The fragment was reaching at the pace of a slow steady pulse, perhaps the pulse of a heart that had been waking from a long count.
The Reaches did not, in the walking, change. The locked light was the locked light. The trees breathed the steady breath she had grown used to. Her feet found the ash and the root and the small loose stone the way her feet had been finding them for months.
She thought, briefly, of her brother.
She had been thinking about him often since the threshold. She had been thinking about him in the way a body thought about something it had been not thinking about for a long time, which was that the thinking did not hurt the way the not-thinking had hurt. The thinking was, for the first time, thinking. He had been seven. He had had hair the color of dark bread. He had held out his hand at the door, and she had not.
She walked. She let the thought come. She did not, in the walking, push it away.
The Reaches ended at a stretch of stone she had not, until this evening, walked to. The stone was not the stone of the Faded Court. It was older. It was the stone the Reaches had been laid on before the trees had grown, perhaps four thousand years ago by the small old reckonings of Lythariel. The stone was a slow grey. It was warm in the locked twilight in the way old stone was warm, which is to say not particularly warm, but not cold the way the stone of a cellar would have been.
She walked the stone for a long count.
Then she felt, beneath her feet, the steady temperature she had been feeling at her ribs.
She stopped.
She knelt.
She placed her palm flat on the stone where her foot had just been.
The stone was the same temperature as the fragment.
She looked down at the small flat piece of grey stone beneath her palm. The piece was perhaps the size of her thumb. It was, by every visible reading, ordinary granite. There was no glow. There was no silver. There was, she could read with her hand, only the small temperature.
She picked it up.
It was, in her palm, ordinary. The granite was the granite of the Reaches's slow old foundation. It was a small grey stone she would not, on any other walk, have noticed.
She held the granite in one palm. She took the fragment out and held it in the other.
The two stones, in her two palms, were the same temperature.
She knelt for a long count looking at them.
She did not, this evening, understand. She did not have a frame for understanding. The fragment had been, since the threshold, reaching. The granite had, in its way, answered. The granite was not, by any reading she knew, of the Codex. It had not hummed. It had not glowed. It was a small grey ordinary stone.
It was, however, the same temperature.
She placed the granite into her satchel beside the arrows. She put the fragment back in the pocket.
She stood.
She walked.
She walked the rest of the stretch of stone. She walked past the place where the ember-trees thinned for the last time. She walked past the place where the wind, which Lythariel had once had, had stopped having decades ago. She walked past the small flat clearing where she had, as a child, sat with her brother to watch his father practice the small ceremonial arrow-loosing the Faded Court had practiced before the Fall.
She did not, this evening, sit at the clearing. She walked past.
The cliff-edge of the Sundering was, perhaps, ten paces ahead.
She slowed.
The cliff-edge was the place Lythariel's coast met nothing. The Sundering was the great wound the Fracture had laid into Lythariel's western edge, and the cliff was where the wound cut. She had been to the cliff once before. She had been to it the year she had been twelve, on a small school trip the Faded Court had organized as part of the lower curriculum's geography unit. She had stood with eight other twelve-year-olds at the cliff's edge and looked out over the slow grey nothing and felt, briefly, what every twelve-year-old in Lythariel had felt at the cliff's edge, which was the careful ache of being a child in a world that had stopped letting children grow into adults at the rate they should.
She walked to the cliff-edge.
She stopped one pace short.
She looked down.
The Sundering was as it had been when she was twelve. The horizon, broken since the Fracture, did not meet the sea. There was no sea. There was only the slow grey nothing where the sea had been before the world stopped turning. The bruised blue-gold of the locked twilight ended, at the horizon, into a thin pale horizonless line that had no other side.
The horizon was the same.
The Sundering was not.
The Sundering, this evening, was making a sound.
Lyra stood for a long count listening.
The sound was small. It was at the edge of hearing. It was, in fact, just below hearing, the way a sound at one's own pulse was below hearing until the pulse changed. The sound at the Sundering, this evening, was a sound she knew.
It was the sound her brother had made when he was seven and had been trying not to cry.
The sound he had made the morning before the door closed. He had been at the eastern wing kitchen. He had spilled, by accident, a small bowl of soft-cheese. The kitchen-mistress had, by careful kindness, not scolded him. The kitchen-mistress had only handed him a cloth. He had stood at the counter with the cloth in one hand and the small empty bowl in the other and had made, for perhaps four seconds, the particular sound of a seven-year-old who was trying not to cry. He had not, in those four seconds, cried. He had, after four seconds, said: I am sorry, Mistress Hellan.
The Sundering, this evening, was making the sound.
Lyra stood at the cliff-edge.
She did not, in the standing, weep. She had stopped weeping at fifteen and had not yet, in this evening, started again. She did, however, listen.
She listened for the long moment of perhaps three minutes. The sound was the sound. It came from the slow grey nothing that should have been the sea. It was steady. It did not increase. It did not turn into anything else. It was the steady sound of a seven-year-old who was trying not to cry, made by the world that had taken him.
She turned her back to the cliff-edge.
She walked.
She walked back the slow way to the Reaches. The granite in her satchel was warm. The fragment in her pocket was warm. The two were the same temperature. Her hands, at her sides, were neither warm nor cold; her hands were the temperature of hands. The locked light, on the walk back, did not change.
She did not, this evening, hum.
She set up at her camp. She built a small fire in the pit. She had, since the threshold, begun to build a fire at her camp again. She had not, before the threshold, built a fire in months. The fire took on the second try.
She ate four bites of cold travel-bread. She had begun, since the threshold, to eat four. She did not, this evening, eat five.
She sat with her back against the trunk of the ember-tree she had set her camp against. She placed the granite on the small flat stone beside the camp where she kept the cloth doll. The doll had been there since the day she had carried it back from the Faded Court eastern wing, in the long long afternoon after the threshold. The doll faced, by her small decision, the locked-twilight horizon.
She placed the granite beside the doll.
The granite was the same temperature as the doll's small worn cloth.
Lyra did not, in the placing, name what she was doing.
She sat back against the trunk for a count. Then she admitted it anyway, the way she always did when the not-naming became its own kind of dishonesty.
She had placed the granite beside the doll because they were the same temperature. That was the fact. The other part, the part she was admitting now, was that the sameness of temperature was the only way she had to say something she had no words for, and she knew this, and she had placed the granite there anyway.
She sat back against the trunk. She let the fire burn down. She let the long pause go.
After a still moment she did not measure, she heard, from the granite on the small flat stone, the small humming she had heard from the fragment in her pocket since the threshold.
It was a verse of the lullaby. It was, this evening, not the first verse and not the second.
It was the third verse. The verse she had not, in her life, heard. Her mother had only sung the first. The fragment had hummed the first and the second, and she had learned the second slowly, in the humming. The third had been waiting.
The third verse was, by her listening, in a voice that was not her mother's, and not her own, and not the bookseller's at the Faded Court. The voice was the voice of a tall man who was very far away and very old, and the voice had been waiting for nine hundred years, and Lyra had found it.
The verse was about the cliff.
It was about a cliff at the edge of a world that had stopped turning. It was about the careful sound of a seven-year-old who had been trying not to cry. It was about a man who had heard the sound, when the sound had been new, and who had reached for the seven-year-old, and who had not, in the reaching, been faster than the smoke.
The verse was very small.
The verse was three lines.
The granite hummed it twice.
Then the granite was quiet.
Lyra placed her palm flat on the granite. The granite was warm. It was, by her measure, the same temperature as the fragment at her ribs.
She did not, this evening, know who the man was.
She lay down on the ash beside the small flat stone.
She slept.
In her sleep, the granite hummed the third verse a third time, very softly. The fragment in her pocket hummed it back, in another voice. The two stones made, between them, the particular harmony of two notes that had been waiting, by some old reckoning, to find each other.
The Sundering, after Lyra had walked away, continued making the sound.
For now, this evening, the Sundering made the sound.
Lyra, beside the small flat stone, did not, in her sleep, hum.
The granite hummed for her.
Up next
*Year 0. The eastern edge of the Sundered Horizon, Lythariel.*
Continue reading